Evil Bunny
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November 28, 2008
Ambassadors From Mars
Savings! Value! Trampling!
However painfully dumb people are individually, they're considerably worse in groups. From the NY Daily News:
"A Wal-Mart worker died after being trampled when hundreds of shoppers smashed through the doors of a Long Island store Friday morning, police and witnesses said. The 34-year-old worker, employed as an overnight stock clerk, tried to hold back the unruly crowds just after the Valley Stream store opened at 5 a.m.Nothing says holidays like the fact that one woman also miscarried because of the wave of dumb. Kids, you've got to remember that kinesthetic awareness is incredibly important when assaulting Chinese import stores for products you probably didn't really need in the first place."He was bum-rushed by 200 people," said Jimmy Overby, 43, a co-worker. "They took the doors off the hinges. He was trampled and killed in front of me. They took me down too...I literally had to fight people off my back."
November 26, 2008
There Is No Truth
I love this country. There simply is no truth, nobody is held accountable for anything, and if you find yourself in a spot, you can simply redefine reality. After spending a ton of taxpayer bailout money on facials and backrubs, AIG received oodles of good press this week for declaring they weren't doling out bonuses to executives.Not so much. From Bloomberg:
"American International Group Inc., the insurer that said yesterday it scrapped bonuses for top executives after a U.S. bailout, will still pay 130 managers “cash awards” to stay with the firm, including $3 million to retirement services chief Jay Wintrob. Wintrob, 51, will get the “retention” payment in two installments, the first in April 2009 and the rest a year later, New York-based AIG said today in a regulatory filing."Genius! Simply rename "bonus" to "cash award" and you're all set.
November 25, 2008
Zak Smith
An artist friend of our who recently stayed with this thought Zak Smith was a little lazy in technique, bolstered above the artistic dredges by his Yale MFA, and probably surrounded with more hype than necessary -- but his work is still pretty fucking compelling. He's currently working on a collaborative effort where artists do an interpretation of every page of Cormac McCarthy's Blood Meridian," but he's got a similar project for Gravity's Rainbow already online, along with his collection, 100 Girls and 100 Octopuses. Did I mention the guy had a brief stint in porn, the profits from which he donates to Food Not Bombs?
Awesome Takes Practice
A real book, from the bestselling author of If God loves me, why can't I get my locker open? and Can I be a Christian without being weird?.
November 20, 2008
Evilution
Indeed.
Ali Taunting Frazier, 1971
November 19, 2008
Tiddy Bear
We Americans are just so innovative.
Crash
Married Man
Got married over the weekend under a sun-soaked Utah hoodoo and feel very good about it, thank you very much.
November 13, 2008
Dumb Exercise Ideas
November 12, 2008
Reality Check
From Alternet, why exactly sophisticated propaganda (or hell, low grade bullshit) is so effective in this country:
"There are over 42 million American adults, 20 percent of whom hold high school diplomas, who cannot read, as well as the 50 million who read at a fourth- or fifth-grade level. Nearly a third of the nation's population is illiterate or barely literate. And their numbers are growing by an estimated 2 million a year. But even those who are supposedly literate retreat in huge numbers into this image-based existence. A third of high school graduates, along with 42 percent of college graduates, never read a book after they finish school. Eighty percent of the families in the United States last year did not buy a book.
November 11, 2008
Tot
When One Poem Nets You Twenty Years In Prison
From Times Online:
Mr Saw Wai’s poem, entitled ‘14th February’, was ostensibly a Valentine’s Day verse published last January in a popular weekly magazine. “You have to be in love truly, madly, deeply and then you can call it real love,” it read. “Millions of people who know how to love, please clap your hands of gilded gold and laugh out loud.”The Burmese poet, a blogger, and their lawyer were all sentenced to prison sentences for the poem ranging from four months to twenty years.But the first word of each line spelled out a pithier message about the leader of the country’s military government: “Power Crazy Senior General Than Shwe”. Mr Saw Wai was arrested the next day and charged with harming “public tranquility”.
Zoe Lacchei
Thomas Woodruff
November 10, 2008
$2 Trillion, No Strings Attached
From Bloomberg News:
"The Federal Reserve is refusing to identify the recipients of almost $2 trillion of emergency loans from American taxpayers or the troubled assets the central bank is accepting as collateral.$2 trillion worth of your money doled out to the nation's largest corporations with absolutely no transparency. What could go wrong?Fed Chairman Ben S. Bernanke and Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson said in September they would comply with congressional demands for transparency in a $700 billion bailout of the banking system. Two months later, as the Fed lends far more than that in separate rescue programs that didn't require approval by Congress, Americans have no idea where their money is going or what securities the banks are pledging in return. "
Maybe we should give Bush a third term as king just to keep us safe?
Satin Rulez
November 09, 2008
Optimist Club
Bed And Oblivion
The Truth
Conservapedia's Version Of Reality
Check out Conservapedia's entry on Barack Obama:
:Barack Hussein Obama II (born in Honolulu,[1][2] August 4, 1961) is the Democratic junior Senator from Illinois (2004 - present) and President-elect of the United States.[3] On November 4, Obama and his running mate Senator Joseph Biden won the presidency after spending a record-shattering $650 million, much of which may have been from foreign sources.[4] Obama will likely become the first Muslim to be sworn in as President, on January 20, 2009, and could use the Koran for this purpose as a Congressman did.Classy!
November 07, 2008
Dan The Man
Say what you want about the man, someone who spent a generation covering some of the biggest stories including Vietnam should not have his life's career marred because he botched a document authenticity verification on one report. Much less a report on how a rich kid we all knew got special treatment, got special treatment. The bosses at CBS, who thought guys like Matt Drudge would make a good impartial investigator of Rather's mistakes, have turned Rather into kind of a Ronin these days, and he's immeasurably more interesting than he used to be:
Crack Pipe
No, I have no idea what this is either.
The Edges Of The Universe And "Dark Flow"
From National Geographic:
On the outskirts of creation, unknown, unseen "structures" are tugging on our universe like cosmic magnets, a controversial new study says. Everything in the known universe is said to be racing toward the massive clumps of matter at more than 2 million miles (3.2 million kilometers) an hour—a movement the researchers have dubbed dark flow.And I'll wager to bet the "dark flow" doesn't much care about your weekend plans, or your 3PM staff meeting.The presence of the extra-universal matter suggests that our universe is part of something bigger—a multiverse—and that whatever is out there is very different from the universe we know, according to study leader Alexander Kashlinsky, an astrophysicist at NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center in Maryland.